huhu

sedihhhh
sedihh
dehh.....


gak-gak sedih-sedih amat syyyyh
it's just sonfusing
really confusing.

my best friend just got kinda got "dumped" by a boy
(if that is the good english)
after i got dumped too.

i miss my lovely kinda of brother for me.
i meet him about twice or three times.
and i miss him
but if i meet him, i (lho kok jadi bahasa inggris??)
klo gw ktemu dy, gw gak bahkan bisa ngomong apapun.
bukan gagap atau apapun
kyak cuma, "hai, loe bla bla bla"
kinda like boring questions.

and still confusing
better to get over it

i feel i'm not the same

God, what had happened to me?
i feel a lot of change.
well, it's a shame to say this that i don't like anybody (boys) for real.
i don't like somebody that even so handsome.
well, it doesnt mean that i like girls (that's so not true)

well, i guess i just better be friends with boys and girls.
maybe i will meet someone taht is the best for me
maybe these days
i've been thinking about FUTURE FUTURE AND FUTURE
mabe i just think about now only.

well, i care about my future but, i still have a lot of time.

i hate to be me these days

gilaa, (what a rude introduction?)
gw sedih, gw senang.
sedih karena gw (seperti) dibodohi oleh cowo yg gw suka.
satu saran : jangan pernah suka sama orang yang lebih muda.

gw senang karena gw jadi panitia bagian bahasa inggris untuk sanmar cup, bulan depan.

JADI SEMUANYA HARUS DATENG KE SANMAR CUP, 10 OKT-18 OKT! DIJAMIN MERIAH.

gw udah suka sama ini cowok kira-kira 2 bulan, dan i (kinda)got dumped by him, 5 days ago.

gw pengin ketemu dia, pengen bilang kalo gw suka sama dia, TAPI GW SAMA SEKALI GW BERNIAT UNTUK NEMBAK.
Jadi, clear, kan masalahnya, gw gak kyak orang bego lagi klo ngeliat dia.
gw gak suka memendam, gw suka blak-blakan.

itulah kehidupan, acting is so not today,
reality is fun!

jadi sekarang gw hanya perlu untuk menyukai diri gw beberapa hari ini.

i hate to love right now, sure don't give up yet

broken english.
bad english.
sorry...

so i kinda going out now, no just kidding.
i want to, but, now answer.
so, i don't care.
doesn't matter, what age, what size, even what family that you come from.
but this guy thta i like doesn't know anything about loving.
fuuhhh.
but, no worries, i care, but i will try to don't care.
he's rich
i'm not
he's good
but i think i'm better. (for real?)


but today, i met him, he gave me this cute smile, and i just didn't see that.
well, i saw it, but i absolutely pretend that i didn't
why every single guys that i like feel more comfortable to talk to my brother than talk to me.
am i doing wrong?
am i bad or what??
every single guy.
i know this guy first before my brother but still...
this guy feels more comfortable w/ my brother than me.

aku bahagia dan kesepian

wow,
knapa tmen-tmen gw udah pada (mau) pacaran
gw belum dapet syapapun
pdkt, belom
pacaran, apalagi

gak pengen sihh pacaran, tapi di jaman kayak gini, nenek-nenek juga masih ada yg punya pacar.
gw masih kesepian,
eittss, tapi bukan berarti gw nulis ini buat minta kasiani dari cwo-cwo syapapun itu.
gw memmng butuh pacar, tetapi gw lebih butuh sahabat.

sahabat gw lagi dket sama cwok.
gw bingung knapa dia gak seneng tapi amaah gw yg direpotin.
tau, ah, itu urusan dia.

gw hari minggu lobur, gila, bangga juga yaahh jadi warga indo.
walau memang negara ini penuh dengan orang yg menyebalkan.
tapi gw gak sabar buat lihat upacara besok.
gimana, yahhh?
?
?

?
?
?
gw kangen sama, ahh, udah gak usah dipikirin, males.

akkkuuu seeennnnannnggg (i mean; aku senang)

gilaaa, gw berhasil
walau ini tanpa gw pikirin sama sekaliii..
dia itu cowok yg 5 huruf ituuu..
wow wow wow
gw smsan am dia.
tapi gw gak sama sekali berharap cowok dengan lima huruf ini perbuat gw sama seperti daniel perbuat ke gw.
gila gw gak mau
dan gak bakal gw bolehin
gw mesti jadi orangnya yg mengikuti arus
dan gw gak boleh hanyut, karena gw udah mengikuti arus dan gw dapet dia dengan cara gw sendiri.
walau memang dia ini saja tapi dari yg lain,,, he's the best one.


i feel it,
you feel it.
that we're meant to be.

new me

jadi gw sekarang memulai terobosan baru
terima kasih kpada cwo yg dulu gw sukain
karena dy gw jadi termotivasi untuk lebih pintar dan lebih membenci gebetannya itu.
untung idia udah deket sama orang lain dan gw tau, kalo gw suka sama dia terus-terusan terus gw gak tau kalo dia udah punya gebetan gimana? sia-sia cinta gw dong???

jadi sekarang gw udah gw suka sama siapapun, gw gak suka lagi sama siapapun. yahhh, memang yg namanya gw suka orang yaa,pasti ada lah yg gw suka sekarang.
tpi yg namanya suka orang gw sekarang gak perlu tau seluk beluk dirinya segala
yg penting sering ketemu.
satu kelas lagi dia sama gw.
walau memang dia suka ngejek gw pake nama orang tua
tapi yaaa, memang lagi jamannya kali??

dan gw sedang suka sama dia. kalo gw lagi mikirin dy seperti lagi makan lollipop, manis dan seru. tapi kalo mikiirin dy terus-trusan bisa bikin gigi gw lebih maju dan bisa bikin gw sakit gigi.

dann gw gak sabar buat pergi ke skolah lagi besok-besoknya lagi-dan sterusnya.

dan gw akan terus semakin menutup diri gw akan rahasia-rahasia gw.
karena masalahnya kalo ada orang yg baca ini terus dia gak suka sama gw, gw nanti bisa dikira rese-lah, inilah, itulah. MALES GW.

tapi kalau gw mau jujur gw sama sekali gak sebel sama cwe tu.
gw cuma merasa diri gw gak seberuntung dia.
tapi yaahh, belajar aja deh gw dulu, baru pacaran.
belum tntu gw masih ada kalo pada saatnya gw mesti punya pacara.
jalan hidup itu memang kita pegang, tapi selesainya kan kita gak tau kapan.

i am a SUPERWOMAN

listened to the single of Alicia Keys

kalau dipikir-pikir ngapain gw suku-suka cinta-cinta ama orang
kalau gw juga udah merasa dicintai dan disukai
kalau memang mau jujur yang namanya menilai diri sendiri gw belum bisa.
tapi yg namanya merasa dicintai pasti adalah orang yang mecintai gw, gak usah jauh-jauh
papa-mama, adik-kakak, abang-kakak, oom-tante, dll
yg pasti yakin sekali kalau gw mati suatu hari nanti pasti anggota dalam suatu oraganisasi cinta ini gak lengkap lagi
tante netty, abang almond, opung doli (dari mama maupun papa), dan lain-lain yg mungkin tidak bisa disebutkan
itu udah gak ada lagi, tapi gw yakin mereka masih ada, dalam wujud yg sama dan muka yg berbeda (bukan berarti gw percaya renkarnasi)
makanya organisasi cinta aku dan keluargaku sudah ditambah dengan kehadiran Yosia, Gloria, Gaby, Laura, Evangeline, Clara, Bima, Esia, Adam, dll
dan gw sayang banget sama mereka semuanya tanpa terkecuali.

kalau nanti gw sakit suatu hari, mungkin gw udah ada yang punya dan gw sudah mempunyai, seseorng yg mungkin sudah berjanji sama gw sehihup semati dan mati hidup.

dan pasti adalah seseorang yang bakal mencintai gw, atau mungkin gw bakal sendiri selama.
pasti gw bakal mensyukuri bagaimanapun juga, ini hidup selama hidup gw bisa mengontrol hidup gw semaunya gw dan semau Tuhan yg di atas.

kalau nanti gw sakit hati gara-gara cinta doang, ya.. gapapalah
cinta itu, kan kata orang segalanya
jadi terserah cinta mau ngapain kita.
makanya kita bisa menangis gara2 cinta.
tapi syukur sampai saat ini gw belum pernah nangis gara2 cinta.
karena kalu ditolak atau diputusin terima aj, mau gimana lagi
mau kita nangis ampe dunia banjir juga belum tentu dia suka dam mau nerima kita, kan?
jika gw sakit nanti gw akan berusaha gak nangis, karena gw SO SUPER, SO SUPER SO I CAN FLY.

When I'm breaking down
And I can't be found
And I start to get weak
Cause no one knows
Me underneath these clothes
But I can fly
We can fly, Oooohh

Cause I am a Superwoman
Yes I am
Yes she is
Even when I'm a mess
I still put on a vest
With an S on my chest
Oh yes
I'm a Superwoman -Superwoman, Alicia Keys

God, this love thing is making me crazy

huh, i kind of like a new guy, and i jt knew that he already has a, how can i say this, just say that he likes another girl.
sad, sad.

uhh, there's one that i like, not in my school, but, in my sport club, well, not the one that i said mean, but the other, but, HE IS TOO GOOD TO ME

i need a boy that not too bad, not too good.
well, i don't know where but i'm about to find out.

i'm single (always be)
i'm lonely (not so so)
i'm who i am (who am i?)
-well, that's who i am with my eye window-

uhh, well, i'm happy the one that i used to like is not in my extra lesson, fiuhh,
he's too stupid to be mine.

i like to day dream, so, everything that happened or happens in my mind, are imagination, and it's about to be happen

hidup dengan perubahan

senang sedihh.

hidup gw rotasinya ada di bawah mau naik ke atas.
artinya gw lagi sebel dan sedihhnya sekarang.

gw kan suka sama cowo tapi coo ini ternyata udah punya gebetan.
gw itu orangnya gampang banget down, jadi langsung gw gak bisa konsentrasi.
dan yg lebih parah lagi cowo ini satu kelas di kelas Pendalaman Iman sama gw.
sial. banget. sial. gw.
satu tahun seperti itu terusss.
sedih. sial. sedih.
jadi gw berusaha untuk menyibukkan diri gw supaya gw lupa dia.
memang gw paling gampang gampang suka dan lupa orang, tapi sialnya gw udah suka sama dia dari kelas TUJUH.

dan ada senang juga sih bagi gw.
gw memang lagi suka orang, bukan online guy itu, tapi lain.
tapi dia lebih muda dari gw.
tapi emang itu masalah?
lagi gw bukan cinta, kok cuma suka
api memang sebenarnya gak benar, tapi biarin aja, daripada suka sama orang yg udh punya gebetan?

sebenarnya gw juga pengen yg namanya punya gebetan, tapi buat apa, kalo nanti gw nilainya jelek, terus gak naik gimana?
digorok.
tapi mendingan gw temenan aja, sama teman-teman yang ada, daripada pacaran.
pacaran itu penting gak pentingnya sesuai kita juga, sih
menurut gw sekarang gw cukup suka sama orang aa, gak perlu pacaran
nant disuruh ini itu ini itu, males
terusss disuruh jalan-jalan ke mall segala, pegangan tangan, dan blablabla...
hidup itu gak cuma ini itu ini itu doang kok
pasti ada yg lain

and i'm searching for it.

i miss really miss

i mean...
if you like, just like someone in your school, and then you almost see him everytime in school, but now you miss him.
yes, i really miss him
every second, every step, every time!!!
but in fact, he's stupid!
really stupid.
stupid
stupid.
but, i like him
NEVER LET GO!!

as i told you, he's just the way he is.
but, as i know he is a little bit....
SOMBONG, GE-ER
and that's what i don't like.
uhh, i really like him.
i like him since i got in my new school, Santa Maria
well, he's nothing at the first time i met him
but this that called "Teenage Love Affair"
and this like and like thing
is the love affair thing

and i like him as the love affair told me.

i Love Love

love is not a word
but, it's a world of our owns
we made them and we are in it now for you who has boyfriend, husband, wife, or girlfriend

so, if i love this guy, so i must make a world for me to love him
so his name begins with, ummm, well the ones that know this thng is only;
-Angel, my sis
-Michelle & Mitzy, my best friends
-Nadya, my secret keeper friend
-Cynthia & Irwan, the ones that know

well, i don't know, this happened twice
first i liked my brother's friend, but still i like the same person that i liked before.
and then i like this online guy, but still i like him...

huh. this is love, or LOVE
i like this guy, for sure, but, this guy is really, well, i don't know
he knows me but, he just looks like he doesn't want to know me, even as a friend
i hope i don;t like the wrong person.

Meet My Imaginary Friends

so, i've got 3 imaginary friends
meet Marie;
-soft
-beau
-cute
-easy to talk to

meet John;
-cute
-care
-nice

meet Wayne;
-nice
-"rese"
-likes to go away

i made Marie since i was in seventh grade
and i met Wayne and John since i was in third grade.
haha. don't you say i'm a freak!
well, it's up to you, i don't care, but friends are more than anything.

beli buku baru

jadi kemarin kira2 2 minggu yg lalu-lah
gw ke grand indo buat beli buku, cuma liat-liat aj dan gw ketemu buku yang udah gw pengen dari 3 bulan yang lau.
yaudah gw beli-lah itu.

di mobil langsung dong gw baca.
gak tau ada apa
kok? isinya pada jorok, menyangkut ttg tempat tidur dan semacamnya.
setelah itu gw gak baca lagi ini buku, karena buku busuk

sekarang di kamar gw ada dua buku busuk, yaitu:
1. The Devil Wears Prada (BORING)
2. Come Together

jadinya gw baca buku psikologi lagi, deh...

i'm happy

i'm happy cause i want to e happy,
well, here's a thing..
umm, i've told you about this new guy that i like
i think i am really stupid
not so stupid but i know i've took the wrong step
well, i don't know.
i think i just lied to myself and to everybody else.
i don't like this online guy.
yes, i don't like this online guy.
i know he is handsome or something kind of like that but i dont like him

err, i like someone, in my school, not in my class, in other
and i'm sure i like this guy
but the problem is just, i've got no, umm, i don't know.
i'm just afraid to talk to him at school.
ohhhh, God give me clues!!

bored, so bored

gw lgi ada di pelajaran komputer, karena bosen, yaaaa nulis2
ini aja.

gw lagi jijik aj, tmen gw lagi buka 21cineplex.com, si cincaw lauraww main film oh baby, adanya juga namanya oh bitchy. (that's qa cool name especially for bitch like her, well, i don't care what people says but, i don't like her).

back to another story,....
gw lagi suka sama seseorang, bukan yg _ _ _ _ _ _ _ itu lagi, tapi yang lain.

tapi ini berbeda, beda sekali, sekolahnya juga beda, dan i really want to meet him

gw suka dia itu dari yearbooknya dia.
teruss, gw bahkan dapat nomor teleponnya!!!!
dan rumahnya dimana. dan lainnya, lalu gw buka e-mailnya.
wuiihhhh, anaknya repot!
TULiSaNnYa bEsAr kEcIl sEmUa sEhInGgA Gw bAcAnYa aGaK SeBeL.
dan yang lebih menyebalkan lagi dia gak suka baca.
OhHhHhHhH..... kasiiiaaannnn.
tapi tetep dong gw suka sama dia.
well, memang cowok yang dulu gw suka memang lebih baik, tetapi cowok yang gw suka dulu ini, dunianya terlalui jauhhhhhh dari gw dan terlalu berbeda, jadi gw takut kalo gw kenal dia gw bakal terlalu lupa sama diri gw sendiri dan berubah.
GAK ENAAKKK!!
and life must move on.
and until now i still hate and hate cinta laurawwwww
dan tukang payung.